Monday, December 20, 2010

of the weekend and some random ramblings

Its totally a mundane Monday for me..
Its low month at work and low month means less work or at times almost no work..

Not that Im complaining about it, coz when its high month, I can go beserk with deadlines!
Its just that, when there's no work I tend to get very VERY sleepy..
Its embarrasing when I 'head-banging' in front of the computer!
And you know when that happens,
you just cant seem to be able to control yourself?
Ngantuknya mintak ampuun....Macam tak tidur 3 bulan..kehkehkeh..

Weekend was good..
For a start, I was loving my outfit..LOVE Grey!

It was my mommy's birthday on the 17th so we all went out for lunch..
and then my dad said he wanted to buy PS3 and Guitar Hero for Fitri.
So we ALL went to S*im L*im..

After much negotiation, we got a pretty good bargain and since hubby have been wanting a PS3 and I did say I was buying it for him on his birthday (I changed my mind and got him a GPS instead)
I bought one PS3 for him..
Boy! was he happy..

Main tak ingat dunia :p

Its going to be another public holiday this weekend,
Looking forward to the half day work next Friday!
We're going to paaaartaaay~~
(party lah sgt!)

'til then,
Toodles lovelies!

Friday, December 17, 2010

Its a Holiday

Arent holidays supposed to make us feel relaxed and rejuvenated?
yes? no?
Its both yes and no, I think.

I went to Penang and Melaka with my Husband and family.
Wont say it was that great though..
I thought it was urm...okay..fine..

Penang makes me want to cry because of the traffic..
it was craaaaaazyyyyyy~~~~
To go to a 5-10 mins destination,
would take us half an hour or MORE!
and I thought KL was bad. :s

I love Love LOVE the seafood at Hammers Bay, Bayan Lepas.
It was one of THE best seafood I've ever tasted.
I would recommend anybody to go there and try!
That was the highlight of the whole trip for me.

Melaka was much better.
Better hotel

The trishaw ride was fun..
hehe..last time I rode on a trishaw was back in 1996/1997
when I followed my dad and Nyai to her village in Indonesia..

Upon reaching Singapore, I could feel my body asking for mercy..
I was jet-lagged car-lagged..
All I wanted to do was sleep for 24hours straight!

Next holiday destination will be just me and my hubby!
A short getaway, to chill..
February come fast will ya!

Wednesday, December 08, 2010

Our 1st

I still remember a few years ago,
when he said we shall get married.
My heart fluttered!
My head dizzy with little birdies flying around it!

When we were courting,
I knew there and then that he was THE man I wanted my future husband to be like..
His seriousness when planning for our future,
His caring nature,
He is appreciative,
He is one with a BIG sense of Humour (love it when he makes me laugh)
and He's got goals in life (whether or not it is achieved, a man must have a goal in life).

When we started planning to get married,
things were not easy,
Slowly but surely..........................
5 Dec 2009
We became Mr and Mrs <3

Ever since that day,
every single day I woke up seeing my husband next to me
and thanked Allah for Blessing me with such a good man to lead me and our small family..

And now,
12 months later
we celebrated our 1st anniversary..:)

is still baby steps to the future...into the unknown..
is still very new..
is the start to many more lovely years together...

To my prince charming,
I Love You
Thank you for being the rainbow in my life :)

Monday, November 22, 2010

Childhood heaven

Weekend was pretty much a laze-around-in-my-jammies kind

Which I looked forward to.

Things were tough and stressful at work, of late.
Madness everywhere,
mind-blowing crisis,
deadlines, urgh! tell me about it!

All that put together with some hormonal imbalances,
You get a crybaby..


Therefore, I was GLAD for the chillaxing weekend..
Now, back at work, slow start but steady increase on productivity level.
Went to lunch with N*urin and decided to walk into 'childhood heaven'.

You name it, whatever biscuits you've ever had when you were a child,
it's there! (and CHEAP too!)

I immediately thought of hubby the moment I stepped into the shop.
If only he was there,
I think he'd buy the whole shop.
LOL! =)

Called him,
and the man said he wanted these 2 biscuits,

He wanted it, He got it!

Next time, Im gonna buy more and give some to my parents and niece and nephews.
Mcm makcik makcik lah.. :p

Thursday, November 18, 2010

The True Meaning of Sacrifice

It was 'Eidul Adha yesterday.
I hope my muslim brothers and sisters had a wonderful and meaningful 'eid.

As for me,
I have never thought much about 'Eidul Adha.
I know the history behind it and I know every 'eid, mosques here will have sheeps lining up for Qurban.
Sacrifice in the name of Allah. That, I know for sure.

This year,
It was different. It was first 'Eidul Adha as a wife.
I began to see the true meaning of sacrifice.
After marriage, I began to see how much sacrifices one has to make in the name of Love.
Love to our other half, Love to our own selves and most importantly Love to Allah..

I started the day yesterday feeling confused and sad.
I was sad because of so many things.
Work, Energy, Family, Time.

For someone who's like me,
realising all this,
I felt overwhelmed with emotions, just thinking about it.
There's many other things in life that involves sacrifice, be it a small one or a big one.
It is not easy.

Now I know why Allah promises Heaven for a wife who obeys her husband.

I pray that I will be given the strength to better myself for the responsibilities bestowed upon me as a vicegerent, a wife, a daughter, an employee and a mother(in future), I'Allah..


Monday, November 01, 2010

Little things go a long way

Been pondering on this matter due to the recent issues that is happening around me.

Relationship needs a lot of efforts to make it work.
I believe that and I held it strong in my heart.

Marriage is not just for a day.
Its for life.
It is not easy to live with someone for 40, 50 or even 60 years down the road without feeling a tinge of resentment or boredom towards them.
Really, it is not easy.
Which is why we heard of couples arguing, at times over petty matters.
Couples married for 20-30 years can still sought divorce, it shows that marriage is not an easy task.

That is why I believe strongly in putting a lot of effort to make it work.
But of course it shouldnt be a one-sided effort either.

Efforts does not neccessarily mean extravagance. One does not have to spend thousands of dollars just to make the other half happy. Once in a while, maybe..
If its done almost all the time, trust me, you cannot survive..

Effort here means, little things in life that is almost always taken advantage of, things that we forget.
Like smiling. Smiling is infectious, ya know..
or just giving a peck on their cheeks or lips every now and then..
or even going the extra mile as doing the household chores together..
It does not need big money to put happiness in one's life (although money still is important).
You just need a little bit of creativity!

Communication skills can go a long way in sustaining a relationship. Though, Im not the most excellent communicator. Im still learning. A step at a time. Respect is salient. No respect given is no respect gained. Understanding and honesty must be mutual.

There's just so many things we can do together with our bestfriend (im using the term best friend as our partner is our bestfriend) to make the rocky road ahead feels easier to go through.

Im not saying this as if Im some kind of a relationship expert. I am still new in marriage life. I am still learning. We never stop learning. Everyday is a new learning day.

I am writing this as a reminder to myself and to share it with anyone who read my blog, if there's any at all.

Thats all for now.

Friday, October 29, 2010

Puzzling Me

Doesnt it amaze you that at times you just cannot understand yourself?
It does for me.

The things that I want, the way that I behave and feel
are at times puzzling..

I may want one thing, and within minutes or even seconds,
I may not want it at all..

I may be laughing and talking non-stop
and out of the blue, I will cry..I might even just shut myself from the outside world..

I may feel happy or just normal and contented,
the next minute I will feel hatred towards a lot of things..
really, like hate hate..

Now, can you explain that to yours truly?

Monday, October 18, 2010


Why is Monday always associated with the colour blue?

Monday Blues.
This thing is psychological..
Truth is, nothing is wrong with Monday..
Its us..

including me..
I am guilty of faulting Monday for all nonsense that happen throughout the day..

I am putting this in words so that I can read back
and laugh at myself for being so silly..

I am not feeling good..
Those upbeat feeling..adrenalin rush..the force that comes from within that makes me just want to go, go and keep going..
I need those feeling...

So come on people!
Gimme some love...
Give yourselves some love...

Stand up and say "I am HAPPY"
Say it LOUD!
Say it until you feel it in you..:)

Hope I've helped brighten up your Monday! ;)

P/S: Dear...come let go swimming today...=)

Thursday, October 14, 2010

13th October 2010
My Prince Charming turned 27

Hope you had a great time yesterday
I Love You Honey :)

Thursday, September 30, 2010

Holloween Scare-fari!

Im Excited!
Hubby's bringing me here this weekend.

Im scared but excited.
The excitement is making me wish for Saturday to come fast.
Im Scared, Curious and Excited!

What else can I say?
Im Excited!

Im Just Quiet

Who am I?
What is my personality?

I've been questioned endlessly nowadays about the way I behave..
They're concerned whether Im feeling lonely or left out..

truth is,
That is me..
I am naturally a quiet person..
I dont just talk to people..
I am reserve and withdrawn, especially when I meet new people..
I dont initiate conversation..
I talk when people talk to me..
I keep to myself most of the time..
Im not the funny girl among my friends..

I am mostly an observer and a listener..
I dont like to complain much..
I dont comment much on things..
I dont go around expressing my feelings loudly..
That is why I have my blog and twitter account..

Only very few people have seen the crazy side of me..
Very few..

Dont feel bad because I am quiet
because I like it that way..

Im quiet..Just quiet..

I was at peace with myself,
until now...
These talk about me being too quiet
is making me feel confused about myself..

I know I cant go on being quiet now..
I have to open up more..
Be known and exposed..
so they said...

I'll try..

Im quiet..Just quiet..

God help ease my path..

Monday, September 27, 2010


I am looking for this book.
Libraries are taking too long for me to wait.
Anybody wants to borrow or GIVE it to me..;)


I want to read this badly.
So malas to go Borders.
If I go I'll end up buying not one but a few more books.


Prince Charming's birthday is coming soon.
As usual, I have been thinking of what to get him since his last birthday.
Im very bad in terms of getting gifts for a boys/men.
Also, Im not very good with surprises, more often than not, my surprise plan got busted wayyy before it's supposed to.


So I decided to go frank.
I told dear whatever I plan to give him.

This year, there were 2 prospective gifts.
Its either a PS3 or a GPS.

PS3 - I know he will love it, but its just a gift for his leisure. (also, when he started playing games, I might as well speak to the four walls...:p)
GPS- I knew this was a better idea. Its such a practical gift, since we are almost always on the road, with our plans to go Malaysia on a regular basis.

I did my homework and fell in love with Garmin Nuvi 3790. What makes me fell even deeper was the fact that its got bluetooth speaker for phone calls on the go!

Dear always have trouble with the handphone speakers and it was a hassle to put on an earpiece while driving. He hates it to the core.

The Garmin Nuvi 3790 also has got a voice activation control. It instantly recognises your command. For example:

There will be a menu of things for you to choose from. Let say you want the gps to start navigating and directing you to your home. We set our home to the 'Favourite list'

Dear said: Favourite.
GPS prompted: a list of favourite places.
Dear said: Home.
GPS prompted: Do you want to navigate now?
Dear said: Yes.

..and the gps starts to navigate to Punggol, our Home! how cool!

We tested this yesterday and were clapping our hands in awe. haha!

The device to me is really good. And Garmin GPS system is known internationally. So yah, I guess that was a good buy.

Dear looks happy with it. I hope that it is really useful for him. :)

So people, if anyone is looking for a good GPS devise, I personally think that the Garmin Nuvi 3790 is a good buy.

Hope I can put up a video of how good the navigation via voice command is.

As for now,
toodles darls!

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Earning IT

Its almost coming to an end..
In a week's time, my probation will end..
I am not feeling great, I am worried..
Due to the incident with my previous job,
I just cannot stop worrying..

I have been learning a lot and worked hard to make sure
I earn my confirmation letter here..

I tried,
All that is left for me to do is pray..

Allah knows best,
So Im just trying my best not to focus too much on worrying..
Instead, I should make the most out of my last 7 days of probation..
If I get the letter, I earned it with Allah's will..Alhamdulillah..
If I dont, at least I have learnt a lot and now better understands the process
to a good looking and readable magazine, and that its time to move on..
(although I fret moving on, if this happens, coz moving on is HARD)

I am at work now,
it is lunch time, I am fasting (puasa 6)
Missed the 6 fasting days last year,
determined to get it this year, hopefully..

I am a weak human being,
Always forgetting to thank Allah for all the beautiful and wonderful things he gave in life..
Must be the laziness in me..Thus, I told myself I must try to fast for these 6 days, at least..
And then, comes the other 11 days pay back fasting time!

If I can fast for 30 days (actually 19 minus the 11),
the whats 11 days, right??
You can do it Khasanah!


Thats all for now,
Toodles darls!

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

'Eid Mubarak

Hello dearies..

Its almost a week of 'Eid.
Time flies..a lot have changed..
Every single day is a new day,
to learn, to forgive and to love..

On this joyous occasion, blessed month,
My husband and I would like to wish all Muslims out there
a Happy 'Eid..

'Eid Mubarak,
Kullu 'am wa antum Bikhair..:)

Back To My Roots

I am feeling so guilty for ditching this dearest space of mine.
I thought of blogging via tumblr, created an acct,
BUT nothing can ever be the same as this secretdoor.

I have a sentimental feeling towards ither.
I put in so much effort to make her pretty and very much personalised and then I go and ditch her.
I am so so bad.

No matter what happen, no matter how long it will be,
this secretdoor will always be a place where I will return to.

So friends,
you can always find me here. :)

I love YOU secretdoor. <3

Monday, May 31, 2010


I woke up at 4am to cook lunch for my dear husband..

Is the day my husband is unwell..

Is the day my mind is TOTALLY absent from my body..

Is the day my husband called me at 11am+ realising I did not switch
off the fire from the stove!!!! :s (luckily, the fire is a small one,
and the food is still edible and warm)

I feel guilty as hell because of what happened..(from 5am all the way
til 11am+?? really? Khasanah??)

I almost cause a colleague to scream for my absent mindedness..

I had to stand outside the door and wait for somebody to open it for
me because i forgot to bring my staff pass..

I feel like going somewhere and scream, "WHAT THE HELL HAS GOTTEN INTO

So that's my Today for you..

Sent from my iPhone

Friday, May 07, 2010

Sneaking Spicy Umian

I miss eating my fav Banquet Spicy Umian! (read: with lotsa cili padi!)

I use to eat it EVERYDAY after work.

Still remember how I used to go Banquet and tapau-ed my Umian. I would
sneak it into my room because i didnt want to share (yes, im selfish
like that when it comes to this fav food of mine :p), and then go to
the kitchen to take a big bowl, a spoon and fork and happily eat the
heavenly Spicy Umian while watching my fav chinese drama on channel 8.
So shiok! ;)

ALL these in my room. Aaah~~ the perks of having your own room!

The best thing is, nobody in my family knew I did all that everyday
after work..hehehe..

Maybe they were thinking that I must be very tired at work and badly
needed a rest..;)

Now, I cant do that anymore because I share a room with my hubby. It
would be a funny sight if I sneak Spicy Umian in our room, and if my
hubby walk in..kantoi lah beb! Later, he also want, how? Hahaha...:p

I am so craving for it now..I dont mind eating it everyday again...and
of course with lotsa cili padi! :)

Oh my Spicy Umian~~ :)

Sent from my iPhone

Monday, April 05, 2010

Words are not enough

Today, was my first day at work..
A new day, a new job and a brand new age for me...

I was a little intimidated with the whole place..everything seemed so
much bigger.. The place, the workload, the number of people..

After a while of orientation by my seniors, thank God I felt relaxed
and was able to see the bigger picture..

The seniors were very friendly and helpful..

Initially, i had my worries about my prayer time at work..i still
remember when i had to pray at staircase landings before..

So i decided to ask a muslim colleague..and to my surprise, he said
there's a musolla dedicated for muslim employees..i wanted to cry out
of joy there and then...

First, God answered my prayers and gave me the job i dreamed of..and
then, he provided prayer that i should always remember His
gift and be thankful of it...

What added on to my joy is that there is a shuttle bus to and from the
building to Alj MRT and Potong Pasir its very convenient..

I am very very thankful to Allah, that words alone cannot describe my
sense of gratitute..

This is the Best birthday present that Allah Almighty bestowed upon me..


Shall update again later lovelies, im off for my birthday dinner!


Sent from my iPhone

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

New life

I have got a job.

You can call it a dream job.

Im just wondering what will my first day be like..
Im excited at the same time nervous..
Its gonna be my first time working in a 'real' organisation..

Never been in one before..
I am tired of looking for a new job everytime..

I just want to do my job well and get what i am supposed to get in due

I really do not want to feel cheated again...

Last Friday was such a big blow to me..didnt expect things to turn out
like that..

Whatever it is, i am moving on..

Here's to a better life ahead,


Sent from my iPhone

Friday, March 26, 2010

the ones I will miss

When one leaves a work place for good,
there will definitely be something that one will miss about it.

In my case,
I will miss my 2 sweetest colleagues..
Ever since I graduated,
They are the FIRST female colleagues I've ever had..

People say female colleagues can be very bitchy at times..
But thats not the case for these 2 girls..
When times are bad in the office and when things get crappy,
They brighten up my day..

Hello everybody,
Meet Yatee and Junn..

Junn was a writer in the company..
She made my days in the office brighter with her laughter..
LOUD laughter and infectious too..:)

She loves Belle from Beauty and the Beast,
and she often spilled coffee on the carpet, on her dress, on the table, anywhere..

Yatee is the designer..
She is my Ice cream buddy..
when we feel like indulging in a sinfully delicious rich ice cream after a full meal,
we will go to the ice cream cafe downstairs..

She's also my 'bekal' partner..
Most of the time she brought lunch from home,
now that Im leaving, her new partner will be the new guy in the block, Wady..

When these 2 ladies are put together in one office,
they instantly brightens up everyone's day..

They are also 2 of the most generous people
I've known..

Sometimes when I reach office in the morning,
there will be chocolates, curry puffs and lots of other goodies on my table..
Memang rezeki melimpah..

May Allah bless them with more rezeki always..

Thats why I said,
I will definitely miss them both!

Eager to scream

Oh yeah...

Today's the day..My last day with this company..
Despite the downside of my experiences here, I cannot deny the fact that I had my fair share of good times too..

The highlight of it all, was when I finally get to meet CT!

Now, its time to close one chapter and open a new one..

I pray that this new chapter will be a better one and there will be no scary episodes in it..

I must also remember my promises to Him Almighty..

For a last day,
I am VERY early for work..
I have organised every files and folders so that it is easy for my replacement later..
(am I good or whaaat??)
I really cant wait for this day to end...!

Eager to scream "IM FREE!!" at 6 o' clock today..

P/S: feeling slightly down...hmm..
P/s/s: my sweet colleague just gave me my FAV choc bars! nak cry leh..huhu..

Monday, March 15, 2010

What A Monday

What a Monday!

I got busted for being late to work..
All due to some "unforeseen" circumstances..:p

Im so going to go to work early tomorrow..

And then, another client postponed their ad,
hence, not helping my already little revenue...:s

I think that it is a sign for me to leave..

I've got 11 or 12 more days before I say goodbye..
I'd like to appreciate every last moments I have here..
The good ones that is..

Cant wait for a new life..=)

Ya Allah, permudahkanlah jalan hambaMu ini..
Sesungguhnya Engkaulah Maha Mendengar lagi Maha Memahami..

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Once in a lifetime

Today, I just want to remember the best thing that happened recently,
that made me feel over the moon...

THE day I met my idol,
D*ato' S*iti N*ur H*aliza..

Met her at the R*oyal P*laza On S*cotts Hotel..
It was the Press Conference for S*uria Elektra..

God knows how I felt at that point of time...

let the pictures do the talking aite? ;)

I'll remember this, forever..=)

Monday, March 08, 2010

DREAMS can wait long long (NOT!)

"sometimes its not that we want to be choosy, but we have important things to factor in thus we request a certain expectation..but people dont know that..and when we give in and follow suit, we face with hardship in life..who wants hardship? nobody..*confuse soul*"

That, is my current FB status. I am in a state of confusion.

I might be jobless starting April.

I've been looking around for a new job for so long..So so long..
All I wanted is for people to appreciate me..I work I commit..

but why did I always end up feeling cheated.

Who says $ is not important?
Dare you say that to my face and I'll knock you down with my smelly socks..

Without $ I can never achieve dreams..
Dreams of studying, dream of making my parents and parents in-law happy, dreams of making it big with my passion in photography, dreams of traveling to the places I dream of going before I die, dreams of having a child and to care and nurture him/her to the very best...

How do we ever achieve them without $..?

I took my bachelors not without $ problems..
I troubled my parents (and aunt, God bless them all) enough to make sure I graduated..
All these is with a LOT of $..

Now, when I wanted to get a job, that pays well,
people just dont appreciate..
(dengar2 dulu belajar FREE)
They give a measly $ and demand that a 3 to 5 person tasks to be done in a day, by 1 person..
They can even toy around with my $, and claimed that the company is not making $..


should that be the case?

Im getting more and more scared to get a new job because Im scared I might land one that is no different from the others..


Now, I've 4 interviews..
1 shift work and 3 9to5..
I dont know whether to accept the shift job, should they offer me..
Time is the big factor..

the other 3, is normal working hours..
Should they accept me,
I pray I will get a $ that is reasonable..

If not, my DREAMS shall wait long long...

Tuesday, March 02, 2010


Test entry via mobile

Sent from my iPhone

Thursday, February 25, 2010

That Precious Little Darling

Visited bestie's crib today...
was so excited to see her newborn..

Nour Qasrina,
she's so precious..
those tiny little fingers melted my heart..
her adorable cheeks are just so kissable and munchable..

Bought her these little darlings..
am glad you liked it Su..=)

One day when Qasrina wears them,
take pictures and show me okay..=)

Here's one more for you people to boogle (read: baby+oogle) at..

Good night Darls! =)

Tuesday, February 23, 2010


I really do not know how to describe what Im feeling right now..

Its been a crazy roller coaster ride with this issue..
He's THE photographer from hell!

Dont know whats up with him,
Is it so hard to just give me my wedding photos?
We didnt even bother him with all the editing, just a simple, "take pictures, give us the raw files. Thats all"

And that took him almost 3 months and counting..
I am clueless to whether I will ever get my photos back..

He turned the table, and blame me for this problem..
When clearly, he's the problematic one!

Whats his problem?
We dont know..He didnt tell us anything and kept playing with time..

Today we found out that he's going fishing!
fishing! can you comprehend that??

No time to give our wedding photos, but can still have fun and go fishing?

He is, my BIGGEST regret in life..seriously!

Im giving time until tomorrow, and if its still the same
thats IT, we're going the legal way..

Money, we can get back..
but memories of my solemnisation is priceless..

Im not going to get my $600 back, but Im asking for more..
To compensate the trauma that im going through because of this bugger!

I'll see you in court. LIAR!

Monday, February 22, 2010

Back to My Roots


Gosh! I miss blogging from my Secretdoor!
New life new blog layout..hope you like it..=)

Been thinking of the new layout..and after much thought, this is it!

If you like it, do show some love at my tag board okay! ;)

so sorry to trouble you, but if you've linked me on your blogs with seventhepisode, do not delete it as that webbie is still active but for professional purposes..thats where the photography portfolios are..

for my blog, its here! at my dearest

till we meet again in the another entry,

Good night mua darlings!